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“If speaking is silver, then listening is gold.” Turkish Proverb

“Who speaks, sows; Who listens, reaps.” Argentine Proverb

“Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.” Publilius Syrus

Week 8’s Chapter:  “Real Life Networking Tips” strikes me as one of the most philosophical chapters in the book.  It speaks from a very generous stand-point – a way to approach people in the real world.  It asks the question,  “How can I be helpful to this person?” From what I’ve witnessed of Ariel, she lives in this philosophical stance.  Take the fact that we are all musing on her book.  It’s evidence that she’s been a great help to all of us who are participating in this blogging challenge.  By the same token,  she’s modeling the fact that she’s also building her business.

We spend so many hours in front of our computers now.  (I literally dream about drafting emails some nights… )  In some ways, the art of speaking to someone, face to face, is well – an art that perhaps some of us need to brush up on – myself included.

It seems to me that the key is to let people talk about themselves.  Ask an open ended question and see where it takes you.  It’s an instinctual thing – human interaction. Sometimes I’m pretty good at it – but I find it’s necessary, when talking to people whom I don’t know, to be as relaxed and receptive as I can be.  It isn’t always easy.  Being in a setting where people have a glass of wine in hand is usually helpful…

I’ve heard that if you want to gracefully insert yourself into a conversation,  it helps to go up to groups of 3 people.  (It isn’t wise to try to talk to 2 people who are obviously engaged in a discussion.)  There is also research that has been done that proves that 5 people is the magic number where conversations will always divide into smaller groups. Next time you’re at a dinner party of 4 (or 5) – take a moment to observe how often things break into smaller talks.

Another tip that helps is to wear something that might be a conversation starter;  maybe a hat, or a cool piece of jewelry, something brightly colored…  something like that.  It sometimes helps others to break the ice with you!

After building rapport and exchanging emails or cards (of course – have a good business card),  it makes sense to maintain a graceful standpoint in following up.  If I’ve managed to make a good connection, in person,  I find people are usually open to being added to my email list.

The biggest goal in networking is to be memorable.  Maya Angelou said,  “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

One final thought. A real touch-stone, for me in life, is something that Franz Kafka said.  When I’m wondering what to do or say or whatever – I try to remember his words. “Remain… listen. You need not even listen, simply wait… learn to become quiet, and still, and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked.  It has no choice; it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.”


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How many of us have been asked why we’re not “famous?”  It’s funny – it strikes me as a naive question – and yet, I’ve been very naive myself.

I heard a statistic that most children, in our culture of fame, believe that they’ll be famous someday.  Who among us can say that we never thought that fame might come to us?  Maybe some of us still think it’s possible.  Maybe it is…

How do the “famous people” get “famous” anyway?  I heard someone else say that it takes a “burning, maniacal rage.”   Perhaps those of us who are still among the unknown,  have only a “luke-warm, moderate hope.”   My own naivete is being challenged daily.   My awareness is growing.  I see that “fame” does not equal “success” and that all of these things are measured in shades of grey.

Week 7 of this challenge focuses on building a mailing list;  email by email, person by person, week by week…  It isn’t a glamorous thing to think that that’s how it’s done – but it is.  Brick by brick.

“Get your message and your music out regularly and consistently.  Build trust.  Create community.  Mine through your inbox.  Set a time aside, each week, to send out a friendly request to add people to your email list.  Offer something in exchange.” It isn’t rocket science – but it’s labor intensive. BUT (and this is a big but!) who are we to think that we can do this thing without such labor? How naive would we be to think,  like kids do,  that someday we’ll just “end up famous and successful.”  We can wait all we want, but without putting the work in, it ain’t gonna happen…

Over and over, in this challenge,  I am reminded that we’re lucky enough to exist in an age where we can reach out to the world and ask to be heard.  We can put ourselves onto the “world stage” in ways that were once not possible.

With all of this in mind,  I have drafted my email-list request letter.  I’ve created a folder, in my mail program, for potential mailing list additions.  I’ve scheduled a weekly time to do the work.  I’ve started a list of friends who I’ll consider doing a list-trade with.  I’m also thinking about the texting strategy.  I put it in my calendar to consider again in a couple of months.

This morning,  I registered my name and repertoire with SoundExchange in anticipation of being included in Pandora. It took weeks and weeks to hear back from them.  I was thrilled to know that my current work will be added to their genome.  I am reminded of something I said in one of my first blog posts here,  “mostly we send out the emails and wait…”

In the end, I say – hold tight to the “luke-warm, moderate hope.”  It springs eternal…

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Insight abounds – in this arena – and things are starting to gel for me.  More and more, I am seeing the value of reaching out to people who have expressed genuine interest in my music.  Why wouldn’t they be interested in the continuing process that is leading me down this path?

I’ve been like many of us – afraid that I will appear vain or braggadocious if I send out frequent email blasts.  Now, I’m realizing that there could be a way for me to make such emails an extension of my voice as an artist. Good things are happening all the time, in my career, that are worthy of sharing.  I believe in keeping things short and sweet.  So, it makes sense that, if I reach out more often, I can keep my messages succinct and to the point.

With all of this in mind,  I’ve put together a list of 3 things that I will aim for in my emails.

1.  Humility is attractive and compelling to me.  [ However,  being so humble that you don’t say anything at all – is neither.  I’m also not a fan of “self-effacing”, or “false humility.” ]  That said,  I will aim for a simple, matter-of-fact, “this is what I’m doing” kind of approach.  I’ll write the kind of emails that I feel would draw me in and make me curious or make me want to listen.

2.  Whenever possible,  I’ll post a gig as part of the blast.  I like it when an email simply spells out when and where the next gig is – but it’s cool to have a sentence or two about what else has been going on.

3.  I like a plain text email – with maybe a link of interest.  It’s an issue of personal taste, but I’m not all that crazy about the emails with the big banners and attachments.  [ In all of this stuff, we need to do what is comfortable for ourselves. ]  I remember noticing that Bandletter has a simple, text email template.  That’s the way I’ll go.  Up to this point,  I’ve been using Ezinedirector.

It was affirming to run across Jill Sobule in a blog discussion about 1000 True Fans.  I met Jill at the Durango Songwriters Expo.  I’ve covered one of her songs at a few of my gigs – and she’s a real inspiration to me.  So, it’s great to be reminded that she is a good business woman – as well as an artist.  She’s found her own style – and I am happy to notice that I find her approach valuable as an influence.

There is no one solution to the issue of self-promotion for independent artists.  I like that this blogging challenge asks us to experiment and make sense of what we are doing in this arena.  It’s great to be reminded that trying something creative and different is part of the fun of this life.  I am learning a lot and finding that this is a small world.  I’m learning that I’m not the only person who has been self-conscious about “tooting my own horn” – or whatever.

It does no good to do all of this work – and then hide it under a rock.

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Whew!  Another intense week – and added to it, I’m now kind of “on the road.”  I did 3 small sets at the Emancipation Day Celebration in Windsor, Ontario this past weekend. The festival commemorates the Emancipation Act of 1833 – which made Canada the final stop on the Underground Railroad to freedom. I’m parlaying the gig into a visit with family and friends in Canada.

I’ve read Chapter 5 a few times and have come up with 2 valuable touchstones;    Bloggers read other bloggers’ blogs.   It is key to post regularly and consistently.

I set up my Google RSS Reader and I’m getting updates landing in my email.  So far,  I’m diggin’ the Music Think Tank, The Dean’s List, Moses Supposes, and Blue Railroad.  I’ve got a ways to go as far as establishing rapport and relationships – but, as Ariel says, it will take some time to leave enough “breadcrumbs” and comments behind to become a legit part of these communities.

I’m thinking more and more that MSi9W is an invaluable process – for a professional life in music.  It has been really cool to wrap my head around all of these concepts and commit to following through with them.  Before I began this blogging challenge – (I hate to admit) – the thought of actually being a blogger was pretty foreign to me.  Now,  it feels really doable and not so intimidating.

Since the beginning of this challenge – I’ve learned so much.  I started by really over-thinking things – and trying to be very succinct.  I didn’t want to bore anyone by going into any detail.  At this point, about half way through, I feel a lot more at ease with just sharing my experience in cracking this world open for myself.  I’m finding, from reading other blogs – in this challenge, that it’s all in the details and in the sharing of experiences (and frustrations) that we learn the most.

As far as finding myself on blogs/posts that already exist – that was pretty cool.  Truth is though,  I already knew that Paul Zollo had done a really nice review on Blue Railroad.  I also knew about Songwriters Vantage, Pozervision, Crossroads, and McCabe’s.  I guess that ties into the value of real-world networking and getting out there.

I have worked to belong to a number of music communities in Los Angeles.  I’m a regular participant in the Songwriters’ Co-Op.  I’ve been to music conferences such as Durango and TAXI.  I’m a part of the music-making-teaching community of McCabe’s Guitar Shop in Santa Monica.  I’m a part of the performing community down on the 3rd Street Promenade.  I regularly go out to hear music and meet people too.  It all adds up.

I’m sure it will take things up a notch to reach out, with diligence, into the cyber world.

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Wow!  That was intense.  I watched all of the clever, short movies at commoncraft.com – very cool.  I read the article about Twitter.   I did my best to follow all of the steps outlined in this chapter.  It felt a little bit like I was “falling down rabbit holes” every where I went – but I think I managed to navigate back to the surface.  My head is swimming with all of this stuff – but it is definitely all making sense to me.

I have debated about getting a SmartPhone or an iphone – but have not gotten either yet.  I am almost due for an upgrade and am deciding which way I’ll go.  When I do decide, I’ll start tweeting from my phone. For now, I’m going to tweet from my computer.

Twitter, Facebook, Flickr, YouTube, iLike, mevio – I was everywhere today.  I dug deeply into “reading / following” a large number of people on Twitter and I’ve gotten many responses back already – to be “followed” back.   I feel like I’m learning as I go – and that, somehow, this challenge to dive in will make sense to me – over time.

On another note, I read an article this week – on the last page of the current Tape Op magazine (if you have it) – by Larry Crane.   I’ll quote some of it here.

Larry was emailing with a friend and peer in recording engineering.   He said, “It was a really crushing realization to look back, after eight years of being booked solid – three to four months in advance, that most of the records I loved the most were completely dead.   Bands had broken up;  people stopped making music.   And worse, in some ways, they were all fine with it – but I felt really sad.   Those projects, that no matter how great you thought they were, and how much promise the artists had (in part because of [my] work), when they grind to a halt that’s it.  They aren’t coming back, and apart from the lessons learned, the character building, and friendship building, it kind of doesn’t matter whether they ever happened or not.   That’s tough to swallow.   For me that’s almost my whole discography!”

The article goes on to say, “More music is produced each year than there is room to write about in magazines, play on the radio, use in films or (certainly) sell in stores and online. Look at the statistics from last year:  98,000 albums were released in 2009 in the US.  Only 2.1 percent of these albums sold over 5,000 copies – but all the records that sold over 5,000 account for 91% of the total sales of music.   373.9 million albums were sold in 2009.”

“In most cases, the artists I know who sell over 5,000 copies of an album (or at least most of the 1000 in their pressing), are doing a hell of a lot of touring, making friends and connections, and running concerted web and press campaigns to keep their faces visible.” “… how frustrating it [is] to work on projects, believe in them, and try to do [my] best, only to find the artists decided not to tour, or that they never even did have any album release plans in the first place.”

“But still, one part of my own recording career that buoys me up is all the artists, with whom I’ve worked, [who] have kept going in their careers (or carved out a solid spot with unique work), and gained a long-term audience and respect in the music world.”

My friends – I think we can count ourselves among those artists who are daring to “carve out a solid spot.” Keep carving.

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On my home page, I installed the widget that allows for a free song download in exchange for signing up for my mailing list.  I chose the title track from my CD, Trust the Sky – thinking that it would have added marquis value. I also made sure to post my pitch on all of my social media pages.  Recently,  I did an overhaul to my website and, having read Ariel’s first edition of Music Success in Nine Weeks, I guess I had a running start at Chapter 3.

I continue to chip away at my other goals too.  Work expands to fill available time.

I’m illustrating a children’s book that will be accompanied by a song.  I began the first two pages today.  Little by little…

"tomorrow is a very happy day..."

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3rd Street Promenade - Santa Monica

Mark Twain, in the “p.s.” of a letter, once famously wrote,  “I”m sorry this letter is so long.  I didn’t have time to write a short one.”

David McCullough said,  “Writing is thinking.  To write well is to think clearly.  That’s why it’s so hard.”

Here is what I’ve arrived at for my pitch.  I invite any thoughts.

“I’m paula mcmath.  I’m a singer songwriter.  I’m influenced by my idols; Mitchell,  Cohen,  Griffin,  Dylan,  and Waits. I try to sing what I can’t say.  I’m most often compared with the acoustic, folk sounds of  Joni Mitchell or Patty Griffin.”

If the elevator ride is long enough,  I would add,  “I aim to distill things down to the right words and then make them sing.  I find the melody that the words suggest – or sometimes vice versa. (On rare occasions, the words and music come together.)  I record the songs simply, acoustically -not overwhelming them with production.”

Yoda said,  “Do, or do not.  There is no try.”  I disagree with this one.  I believe that there is try.  Trying is important.

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Since it seems 6 is the magic number for tasks to complete in a day,  I created 6 areas of focus for my goals.  They are:

1.  PR / Press:  do cyberPR, find leads and send CDs out, seek press

2.  Songs:  write 15 new songs by the close of the year

3.  Gigs:  continue weekly gigging – book 2 more big gigs by Dec.

4.  Exercise:  5 days week – walk and do light weights

5.  Online / Social Networking:  email, blog, Facebook, Twitter

6.  Music Conferences / Networks:  TAXI in Nov., Durango in Feb.

Within those 6 areas, I’ve set goals for myself to attain by the end of the year – or the start of next year.  I’m going to chip away at them by doing one thing each day towards each goal.

Music Success in 9 Weeks / Blog Challenge
mSi9wks / Blog Challenge

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I’ve learned a few things, in the last eight months, about the process of self-promotion as a musician / artist.   It’s not a comfortable place for me to dwell in…  It’s uncomfortable, for me, to feel like I need to be saying “look at me — look at me” when what I do actually comes from a very quiet, introverted place.

I’ve found that most of the time, things move really slowly.  Mostly you send out the emails and wait… but gradually, a few things have come back to me for my efforts.   I’ve gotten a couple of nice reviews recently – one at Paul Zollo’s ezine, Blue Railroad     http://bluerailroad.wordpress.com/reviews/
and one in Music Connection                     http://musicconnection.com/digital/index.php?page=49ws/

At this point, I feel a need to simplify and narrow my focus.  I guess that is where Ariel’s Blogging Challenge comes in. I look forward to the accountability and motivation that this community will offer.